I would say I was loosing my mind. There is this crazy excitement in my spirit that I cannot contain. For the past four months I have been grieving and mourning my divorce. As sick and unbelievably painful that experience was, I have never, not even once, in any tiny winy manner, been afraid, desperate or even anxious about anything. I was hurting, and deeply for that matter, yet thanks to my faith, not once did I ever feel alone.
Yet in my anger I did subconsciously rebel though, I rebelled against everything I hold dear, my faith, my spiritual parents but mostly against myself. I think I subconsciously blamed myself for enduring the abuse for as long as I had. I blamed myself for caring more for other people than I did myself and as a result I shut down and have been on auto pilot mode ever since, until this week!
I am back, the excellent, zealous, careful planner and make things happen Zanele I know myself to be just woke up from her slumber. Mourning period over, no more taking it a day at a time, am taking my life back and am ready to live my best life ever and I'm soo excited its ridiculous, seriously if I didn't know better I would really think something was wrong with me, but to the contrary something is very right with me.....and its about time!!!
